Ok, so that LOST recap before the premiere tonight was actually great. It was logical instead of chronological. We were both pleased with it.

Wow, that’s a lot of tropical fruit. Looks like papayas. This flashback is in L.A., and I’m guessing this is Jack. Or Jack’s dad, but I’m thinking Jack. I was right! Hey, whoever’s driving that car on TV totally just went Dukes of Hazzard. Um, make that flashforward. Hurley is yelling that he’s one of The Oceanic Six. Well, that’s interesting. So I’m guessing only six are going to make it back from the island? Ok, we know Jack, Hurley, and Kate make it back. Someone else makes it back who later dies, but it could be Hurley who dies.

I’m guessing Hurley freaked out when he saw lottery tickets behind the counter. Hey, so why isn’t Hurley telling Ana Lucia’s old partner that he actually did know the crazy lady?

Back in TodayLand, they don’t yet know that Charlie is dead.

Haha, Ben got what was coming to him. A smack across the face from Rousseau.

Aw, what a jolly fat guy Hurley is. He’d make a great Hispanic Santa, except that he looks about as Hispanic as Bill Richardson.

Anyway, it’s a very sad moment when Desmond has to say, “I’m sorry about Chaaahlie., broothah.” Oh, also panic starts to set in among the people on the beach, because Desmond says the boat people are bad bad people.

Rousseau and the hill people are starting to head to the beach, and Ben is being walked like a bloody donkey. The beach people grab their guns at camp. It’s ON.

In the future, some guy claiming to be an attorney for Oceanic offers to move Hurley from his funny farm to a nicer funny farm where he can see the ocean. Hurley catches on that he’s a Crazy Bad Dude, and Crazy Bad Dude starts asking if they’re still alive. Dun dun dunnnn. So The Oceanic Non-Six (the Leftovers) are probably still alive and on the island.

In TodayLand, even Sawyer has taken pity on Hurley, because Hurley’s lost his bestest friend. And now Hurley has hung back and gotten lost in the woods. Uh-oh! He found Jacob’s Cabin of Insanity. And he can’t escape it! And Locke has found Hugo. I think Locke’s going to become the new Ben. Look for Locke to kill Ben in vicious fashion. And whoever the Non-Six are, they’ll become the new Others.

When Kate hugged Jack, it turns out she stole the sat phone! Jack’s gonna have to try to make his own out of two coconuts and a palm leaf.

And now Kate is also alone in the jungle, and she has the phone, and the mysterious Naomi is bleeding all over Kate from above. She’s jumps down on top of Kate! And Kate trusts her (after Naomi takes the knife away from her throat), so she gives her the phone. Naomi makes one final call to sabotage the survivors and then dies. As she’s dying, she tells the guy on the phone to tell her sister that she loves her. I’m betting that Naomi’s sister is Nadia, Sayid’s old flame.

Lock and Hurley join up with the beach people and the hill people, and Hurley has to tell Claire that Charlie’s dead.

In the Funny Farm of the Future, Dead Charlie comes to visit Hurley. They both agree that Charlie’s dead, and Dead Charlie (who looks just so… cute…hubba hubba) tells Hurley that yes, he knew he would die. And then Charlie starts saying over and over that They need Charlie. Who is They? The Non-Six?

Back on the island, Jack, Ben, and Rousseau show up, and Jack punches Locke. They struggle for Locke’s gun. “You’re not gonna shoot me, Jack.” Jack pulls the trigger, but the chamber is empty. Locke: “It’s not loaded.”

Kate shows up and says Naomi didn’t give up the survivors. Locke says he’s going to the barracks. And “come with me if you want to live.” I knew it! He’s a T-1000 (irregular)! Hurley makes a big speech, and people start going to the barracks with Locke and Hurley. Ben, Rousseau, the kids, Sawyer go with. Kate is stricken that Sawyer is going. Claire isn’t going? Huh.

Future Land again, and Hurley is playing basketball. Jack comes to visit. Jack is actually shaven and apparently a surgeon again. Is this before or after Al Qaeda Jack? Oh. He’s thinking about growing a beard, so this is before Al Q Jack. Hurley knows that Jack is there to see if Hurley went nuts, see if he’s going to tell. Jack asks if he is. Hurley apologizes for going with Locke and says he should have stayed with him. Hurley thinks they did the wrong thing, thinks they need to go back. Jack says nevah! Hurley says nevah say nevah!

So Jack and Kate are staring at the plane wreckage together. It looks like they’re at the cockpit. Alone. And they see someone parachute in from a helicopter. Frank already deleted it, but did that helicopter have a Dharma symbol on it?? Y’all tell me.

Anyway, the parachuter looks like Henry Thomas (Elliot from E.T.), and I looked it up. It’s Jeremy Davies, and when I first saw him in Saving Private Ryan, I thought then, too, that he was Henry Thomas. But he’s cuter than Henry Thomas. He also looks like Jordan Collier on the 4400.

Anyway, he asks Jack if he’s Jack. Dun dun dun… Jack looks at him in shock, because it’s not like Jack said his name over and over on the sat phone.

So. Pretty good premiere! The beginning of the end, which is four seasons of sixteen episodes. More questions, but some answers. I’m sad that Charlie’s dead for real.