Tonight is the premiere of magic-show-for-the-new-millennium Phenomenon on NBC. Judged by “Masters” Uri Gellar, the “spoon bending” fraud from the 1970s famously exposed on the Johnny Carson Show, and Criss Angel, the star of “Mind Freak” who has never once used a continuous one-camera shot of his “amazing” tricks. “Celebrity” helpers are former supermodel Rachel Hunter, Leno show intern Ross Matthews, and actress Carmen Electra.

The first performer is “mentalist” Ehud Segev, whose idea of telekinesis is squeezing the metal part of a light bulb until the glass breaks–ooooooohhhh. He also claims he is bona fide because he had a dream his brother was killed when he was 17 and it came true–TEN YEARS LATER! I’m going to go out on a limb and make a prediction that this show is going to die a lot sooner than 10 years from now. Ehud has Ross touch Carmen through telekinesis, which is exceedingly boring. Note to would-be magicians–if you have to spend as much time trying to convince us your trick was amazing as you spend on doing the trick, you’re probably not a very good performer. Criss Angel unloads on him, saying he did not push the envelope and implying his act was stolen. Uri Gellar (the Paula Abdul of this show) notes that he has great ability to manipulate “mind energy”. I give the first act a D.

Next up is Jim Karol, who looks like the guy who founded the Church of Satan. He self-promotes by showing an article that states that thousands won the lottery by playing his “dream number”–of course, the article was from Weekly World News! [SK: LOL!] Karol is a pain magician, and I hope he means he causes pain to himself and not to his viewers. First, he gets out a fox trap which he shows is so powerful that it can break a pencil in half–ooohhhh! Rather than use it however, he pulls out a bear trap (which, incidentally, he does not show breaking anything–not even a pencil). He grabs Ross’s arm and threatens to put it in the trap (which was highly amusing), but then puts his own fingers in –ooohh. Uri thinks he’s great, Criss hated it. I give this guy a D- (he would get an F except that I enjoyed him terrorizing Ross). [SK: Is Ross that guy that talks like a girl?]

Next up is Uri, who is trying to get America to use its collective mental powers–not to put out fires in California, but to predict which of five symbols he has written on a piece of paper. It’s really just a Darren Brown type of trick, except Uri wants to pretend its real, while Brown admits that his stunts are based on the funny ways the human mind processes information.

Next up is Eran Raven, who is a “death-defyist” who is fascinated with danger. Apparently his dinghy sunk a few years back, and it changed his life. He’s going to play Russian roulette with six nail guns. His delivery is impossibly stiff and over-dramatized. Carmen loads one of the guns with brad nails while he is blindfolded. He then blindfolds her and has her repeat the numbers. Apparently he can tell which one was loaded just by the tone in her voice (like a poor man’s Darren Brown)–assuming of course he didn’t cheat somehow. It would be simple to rig the prop guns, and maybe it was as simple as him feeling the weight difference. Uri loves it and spends most of his critique pumping up the act. Criss thinks he did a great job but (impliedly) not as good a job as when he did it with a loaded gun. Of course, he doesn’t mention that Darren Brown did it with a gun famously live on BBC years before Criss did the trick. I give the act a C-.

Next up is Gerry McCambridge, who got his magic powers when his parents divorced and he didn’t predict it ahead of time. Since that time he has been training to be “THE mentalist”. He grabs some people out of the crowd to hold envelopes, and he has other people in the audience help him pick out a phone book, a page, and a column. Then he runs his finger down the column and Rachel Hunter stops him on a number. Not surprisingly, the envelopes have the correct phone number. I thought it was entertaining and give it a B. Uri was not impressed by the presentation–dull, flat and predictable. Criss is also unimpressed. That’s kind of funny, because it was the only trick that remotely interested me.

Next, the reveal on Uri’s mental challenge–the calls are in and the votes are almost a classic bell curve as you go down the line of the five symbols. Uri BARELY picks the correct symbol. 28% picked the star, but 27% picked the circle.

The host ends with a classic question: “Is the impossible possible?” Uhhhhhh–how could that be–they are opposites, aren’t they? Now the real trick is if they can get me to watch this dreck a second time.

Want more? Go to Sirlinksalot.net Phenomenom Links