I can’t really snark this show. It’s as funny as they come and needs no snarkage, especially since the guy at Phyllis’s wedding finally judged Angela The Judger for being promiscuous. The only comedy ever funnier was Arrested Development (stupid monkeys at Fox screwed that one up). And Scrubs is nigh-equal. But after watching the first three seasons again on DVD, I have to say, The Office takes the cake.

Anyway, I can recap and/or point out the high points, right?

Are Frank and I the only ones who truly do not get why that Earl show is popular? We tried watching it, and snooooooooooze. It’s amazing that show got the coveted 8:00 spot. Paging Dr. Cox, Dr. Perry Cox!

Poor Michael. Jan has taken over his condo. He’s calling Ryan his “protege.” Haha. And since he’s looking at the camera man while driving, he hits Meredith in the parking lot with his car. HAHAHAHA. They *are* always looking at the camera.

Opening credits are the same. We always sing, “Life is unfair,” ala Malcolm in the Middle, at the end of the song. Try it next time, you’ll see that it really should end that way.

Jim and Karen broke up after the interview. She told Jim she wasn’t going anywhere and then cleaned out her desk the next day. And Pam has to have her computer fixed because she was trying to buy a celebrity sex video online. Hahaha. Jim is there for the humiliations.

Jim and Pam say they’re good friends again. They’re making a point of trying to hide it *blatantly* from the office.

Michael: “Meredith was hit by a car. I took her to the hospital. The doctors did everything they could. And she’s going to be fine.” It’s like that doctor on Arrested Development. “I’m sorry. We lost him… He escaped out the window.”

I love how Michael mangles his metaphors. Dogs would beat fish, right?

Michael is having to explain the Meredith incident to his new boss, Ryan. Ryan has a 5:00 shadow. I’m going to have so much fun with the Michael/Ryan dynamic this season.

The employees are mercilessly teasing Michael.

Angela and Dwight are talking about “the alkie” Meredith, and Dwight is enduring the instructions for how to take care of Sprinkles, Angela’s cat, at lunch. There are LOTS of instructions.

BTW, the first four weeks of this season are one-hour eps. And if you didn’t know, they’re supposed to have more than 30 eps this season, last I heard, and several of them are hour-long eps. That is wicked cool.

I’ve seen Andy but haven’t seen Kelly or Creed.

Oh, there they are, at the hospital. Michael, unsurprisingly, pulls out Meredith’s IV accidentally. She wants everyone to leave. Michael wants everyone to wait so Meredith can forgive him in front of everyone. She refuses, because he broke her pelvis. He crawls on the bed and lays on top of her to try to hug her, which is a little painful when you have a broken pelvis. I assume.

After lunch, ROFL, Dwight comes back and tells Angela that Sparkles is dead. He means Sprinkles. The white one. “Don’t worry, she’s in a better place now. And by that, I mean the freezer. Because of the odor.”

Michael has decided the office is cursed. Michael: “I’m not superstitious, but… I’m a little stitious.” I’m cackling.

Michael is questioning everyone whether they did anything like park on an Indian burial ground. Michael picks on Toby and even calls him Satan. Poor Toby, so mistreated.

Angela’s on about her cat, and Dwight says that since cats give neither wool nor milk nor meat, he doesn’t care about them.

Michael engages everyone in a religious discussion. It’s just too much. Too funny. “The head of a monkey with the antlers of a reindeer with the body of… a… porcupine.”

Meredith has been bitten by a bat, a raccoon, and a rat recently. They treat her at the hospital for rabies, and therefore Michael decides that he saved her life after Dwight endangered it (in the bat incident).

“Is there a God? If not, what are all these churches for? And who… is Jesus’s dad?” I’m probably going to hell for thinking that’s funny.

Kevin, who has been mercilessly harping on PB&J (Pam Beasley and Jim) all episode, has decided that it is a waste that they’re not together.

Which they are! The camera spies them getting into a car together and kissing after work! Yay!

I’ve heard several people worrying about how they can keep the show going if Jim and Pam are together, but there is so much else going on that I’ve decided it is perfectly okay for them to get together and stay together. K, writers? This is how SarahK wants it. Kthx.

Michael has organized a Fun Run. Race for the Cure for Rabies.

Andy finally speaks half an hour in.

Hahahaha. Phyllis is making a quilt for the run, and it has the animals that have bitten Meridith on it.

Andy has taped up his nipples for the run, and it looks like he has boobs.

Angela to Pam: “I’m having relationship problems, and since you’re always having relationship problems, maybe you can help me.” Turns out that Angela’s frozen french fries had been shredded. In the freezer in which Dwight had placed her cat. Hmm. “Did Roy ever kill one of your cats?” “Actually, I’m more of a dog person.” They’re doing an autopsy, and she is taking all her grief out on Dwight.

ROFL!!! The camera guy is playing back the tape of Jim and Pam kissing for Jim and Pam. Pam: “Yeah, I gave him a ride home, because… um… we’re dating.” They agree it is going really great.

Pam walks into Michael’s office after Michael tells her to come in, and she sees his turkey neck and giblets.

Instead of firing a racing gun for the run, Dwight fires an actual gun into the air. Looks like a .357 magnum. Python or Anaconda (yes, I know, Anaconda is a .44 magnum, we own one, but I really just can’t tell what kind of gun it is — looks closer to a Python)? It goes off like a cannon. Michael pantses Toby as the race starts. Andy is running in Kevin’s wake to eliminate draft resistance. Hahaha. Pam and Jim are in last place in the race, and they’re holding hands! Stanley, Creed, and Oscar have taken a cab. And Toby, to whom Dwight was supposed to give Exlax, has received Immodium instead and is running a great race.

“Cat heaven is a beautiful place. But you don’t get there if you’re euthanized!” Angela very unhappy with Dwight. “I am a farmer. I did what city folk can’t do.”

Toby wins. “The winner… is Toby Flinderson!” What a last name. And they have ended up 5K from the office instead of going in a circle back to the office. Andy’s nipples are bleeding.

Michael has gotten himself dehydrated because he passed on the water Jan was handing out, because rabies causes a fear of water. That’s solidarity right there.

Pam: “I know you, Michael. I saw you naked.” “You don’t know me. You just saw my penis.”

And that’s pretty much all that needs to be said.